Appearance Clothes Tucking

Beginners Guide to Tucking

For many trans women, being able to wear the clothes you want without the ‘bulge’ is an important part of feeling normal. Whether you are wearing a dress, exercising, or even going swimming, there are many good tucking options that can be comfortable and give you the look you want.

How to Tuck

There are a few different ways to tuck, but generally it involves hiding the penis by folding it back between the legs. Most methods push the testes up into the inguinal canal in the lower abdomen above and to the sides of the base of the penis.

WikiHow has a great tutorial on tucking (with images!).

Though it can be a little uncomfortable to start, tucking should never be painful. If your testes or penis hurt, you’ve probably got things in the wrong place or too tight.

Once folded, the penis is kept in place using a few different methods.

Option 1: Tight Underwear

The easiest, and generally most comfortable way to keep things in place is using tight underwear. You need to use pretty sturdy underwear in order for everything to stay in place. Full-coverage, athletic underwear works best as it has a lot of stretch and material to keep things where they need to be. I’ve had good luck with the Balance Tech brand.

Avoid lacy panties and thongs. Though they look nice, these don’t have enough stretch or material to really hold things in place all day.

Though not as well known, there are a number of different kinds of trans-specific underwear available on online shops like Etsy. These are designed specifically for tucking, and made out of more sturdy fabric. These designs will often include padding up front to give you more flexibility in how you tuck. A good brand to start with is LeoLines; they’re great quality but custom made, so can take a while to ship. TomBoyX also sells a tucking specific bikini panty that is pretty good, especially for exercise.

Though easy, wearing underwear will also be the least secure way to tuck; you’ll risk of things getting out of place, so its often not the best choice for more revealing clothing.

Option 2: Gaffs

The second option are gaffs. These are kind of like very sturdy underwear designed specifically for tucking, and also usually include padding up front. The good thing about gaffs is that they give you a lot more room to work with; if your penis is on the smaller side, you may not even have to fully tuck in order to get a flat look.

Because the hold is more secure and there is more room for things to move around, many trans-women find gaffs much more comfortable to wear everyday.

The downside of gaffs is they can look pretty bulky (think Depends), especially if you have a slimmer body shape or like to wear tighter clothes.

I have found are a couple of good gaff options that aren’t too bulky, and give you a nice contour for tighter fitting clothes.

Option 3: Tape

The most secure way to tuck is to tape everything in place. Generally, you’ll use a medical tape designed for use on skin, and run the tape down, under and up your behind to hold things where they need to be.

If you want to wear really tight dresses or even a swim suit, taping is your best option. Plus, you can wear whatever underwear (or no underwear) that suits your fancy.

There are a few downsides to taping:

  1. Its hard to go to the bathroom. You need to untape everything before you go, and then reapply the tape after you are done. During the day, you can usually only do this a few times before the tape doesn’t adhere as well as it needs to.
  2. It takes practice. Getting the tape in place while holding everything where it needs to be can feel a little like juggling. It will take some practice to get things in the right place and secured.
  3. It can be less comfortable. Taping gives you a pretty tight fit without a lot of room to move, so it can be more constricting and uncomfortable, especially for all-day wear.
  4. It can be messy. The glue used in tape usually leaves a residue on your skin you’ll need to clean off. Not a big deal, but one extra annoyance.

One neat product I found recently is the Tuck Tape from Unclockable. It’s a single use product, but makes taping a lot easier, and is waterproof so you can use it to swim. It’ll usually last for 3 bathroom breaks, so also is a better option for all day use than regular tape. It is a bit expensive to use everyday, but perfect for the occasions where you want security and reusability.

Last Thoughts

Can I Exercise While Tucked?

Sure you can! You may need to keep things a little looser than you would otherwise, but there is no reason you can’t tuck and exercise. Depending on what I’m doing, I’ll use either athletic underwear or the UnClockable Tuck Tape.

Plan Ahead

The best way to avoid wardrobe malfunctions is to plan ahead based on what your day looks like and what kinds of clothes you want to wear. If you won’t be able to change clothes or refresh your tuck for a long period of time, you’ll likely want to go with something more comfortable like tucking underwear. On the other hand, if you need total security for a short period of time, taping is your best bet.

Dealing with Erections

It happens. It is also pretty uncomfortable. Though the tighter the tuck, the more difficult it is to get an erection. That said, its not usually visible and likely will go away quickly. If you’re really uncomfortable, it can be a good time for a strategic bathroom break to adjust and get things re-situated.

Appearance Hair

Three Tips for Choosing Your MtF Wig

If you are transitioning from male to female, you have probably considered getting a wig. Whether you have short hair or have male pattern baldness, a wig can be an important part of creating an authentic feminine look and make you immediately feel better about your appearance.

Unfortunately, it’s really hard to find good information on wigs for trans folks, and it can feel overwhelming, especially if you’ve never had any exposure or experience with them before.

I wore a wig for the first year of my transition, and I still occasionally wear one to this day. They’re great if you know what to look for, and can be a fun way to try a new color or hairstyle without any regrets!

There are lots of good options for wigs that won’t break the bank; but like most things, you get what you pay for, and I think its worth spending a bit more on a good quality wig since your hair is such an important part of your appearance.

Tip 1: Get a Lace Wig

First things first, you need to decide what kind of wig to buy. Their all different kinds, but I recommend a lace wig, either front or full lace. These will give you the most realistic look, and can be left on for days at a time with only minimal touch up – you can even shower and swim in them if you like!

A lace wig is one where the hair is tied onto a very thin mesh or tulle fabric (called a lace). The hairs at the edge of the lace are usually hand tied and plucked to give you a realistic looking hairline. A front-lace wig only has lace at the front and is meant to be worn down, while a full lace wig will have lace all around the circumference and can be styled and worn anyway you choose.

The downside of lace wigs is that they’re more expensive than other types, and they take a bit longer to apply. In order for the lace to adhere to your skin, you need to use a wig glue and apply it all around the edge of the wig. This can take some time, but the upside is you can then wear the wig for an extended period, and even sleep in it if you like!

There are two front-lace wigs on Amazon that I’ve tried and recommend, a 12” and a 22”. Both are relatively low-cot and worth giving a try if you want to see how it looks.

After you get your lace wig, you’ll need to trim the lace to match your desired hairline.

Last note: if you can, get a lace that matches your skin tone. It can be hard to blend a darker lace into your makeup if you have lighter skin.

Tip 2: Pay More for a Human Hair Wig

Cheaper wigs are usually made of synthetic fibers, and are hard to make look realistic. If you’re interested in looking your best, nothing is better than a real human hair wig:

  1. They last longer than synthetics.
  2. They’re easier to wash and style since you can use any normal hair product and heat.
  3. They feel better.

The downside is cost; human hair wigs can be more expensive than synthetics (but still quite reasonable). Some people prefer virgin hair wigs (meaning they’ve never been dyed or treated) but those are really expensive and don’t provide much benefit. A Remy hair wig still has the cuticle attached and is collected in bunches, so the hair all runs in one direction and looks shiny and natural.

If you’re looking for a good source of full or front-lace human hair wigs, I recommend LaceWigsBuy – they have a pretty wide selection in stock (and a hug selection custom made to order) with fast shipping.

Tip 3: Get a Shorter Wig

As appealing as long flowing locks might seem, long hair can be frustrating. If you’ve never had long hair before, I recommend going with a 12” or 14” wig first. You’ll need to learn how to handle, wash and style your hair (its a lot!) and it can be overwhelming if you’re trying to figure it out with almost 2 feet of hair.

A 12” wig will go down to your shoulders and you can still put up in a pony-tail or behind your ears.

Some Final Tips

A few other things I learned wearing a wig.

  1. When you first get your wig (or put it on after storing it) you’ll want to make sure it lays down on the top of your head. Use a hot comb for a few minutes to help the hair lay down, avoiding that ‘poofy’ unkempt look.
  2. Be liberal with hair and anti-friz spray. Wigs can collect static and be hard to get ‘down’ than your natural hair, and again, you want to avoid the poofy look.
  3. If you want an extra realistic hairline, don’t be afraid to pluck some of the hairs in the lace so the pattern is more realistic. Especially with cheaper wigs that have been made by machine, the hair is in exact rows which doesn’t look natural (but you can only tell if you look really closely).
  4. Don’t be afraid to trim around the ears, especially if you have a smaller forehead. Most wigs are made to standard sizes, and can hang over your ears if you don’t trim them up (or make your ears stick out).

I hope this helps! Let me know if you have any other wig questions in the comments and I’ll do my best to answer!

Body Care Clothes Hygiene Lists

MtF: The Complete List of Everything You Need to Learn

When I first decided to transition from male to female, I (naively) thought that it was as easy as growing hair, getting some boobs and wearing different clothes. I’ve got a lot more coming on how (and why) I was so wrong, but today I wanted to share my rough and evolving list of everything you’ll need to learn and be able to do in order to successfully pass as a woman.

This list isn’t exhaustive, and not meant to be intimidating. But there is a lot to learn. And while you certainly don’t need to be the best at each of these things, but you’ll generally need to be as capable as a cis-woman. Realistically, you have to learn a set of skills that every genetic woman has had a lifetime to work on.

There is no timeline for how long it takes, but the more time you put in, the faster you’ll be able to successfully pass as a woman in most situations. Think years not weeks or months.


Looks are a primary, but not exclusive, way that people identify gender.


  • How to prep your skin for makeup
  • How and what makeup to buy (there’s a ton!)
  • How to pick the right color makeup
  • How to apply color corrector
  • How to apply foundation
  • How to apply concealer
  • How to blend colors
  • How to accent/contour your face
  • How to create eyebrows
  • How to do your eyes
  • How to do your lips
  • How and when to touch up your makeup
  • How to do subtle makeup (you can’t look like you’re going out to a club all the time!)
  • How to go about your day without touching your face (this is really hard!)
  • How to eat and drink with makeup on
  • How to take your makeup off
  • The hardest part? How to make your makeup look natural, instead of a looking like a guy wearing makeup 😜


  • How to wash your hair
  • How to prep your hair
  • What tools and products you need to buy for your hair
  • How to brush your hair
  • How to blow dry your hair
  • How to curl your hair
  • How to make your hair look like you didn’t do anything to your hair
  • How to keep your hair out of your face
  • How to keep your hair out of your face but also as close as possible to your face
  • How to not tangle your hair
  • How to keep your hair looking decent throughout the day
  • How to find a hair stylist
  • How to afford a hair stylist


  • What jewelry to buy
  • How to wear earrings
  • How to wear necklaces
  • How to wear simple jewelry
  • How to wear fancy jewelry


Hahaha, clothes are a baffling ordeal. Good luck to you ma’am!

Bras/Underwear/Comfy Clothes

  • What kinds of bras you need (you need many)
  • What kinds of underwear you need (you need many)
  • How to buy bras, and from where
  • How to find bras that fit
  • How to afford bras and underwear (seriously, why is this shit so expensive?)
  • What to sleep in to keep from smashing your boobs
  • What to wear around the house when no one will see you but you still want to feel cute
  • What to wear around the house when you really don’t give a fuck
  • What is the most comfy thing you can get away wearing in public

Work Clothes

  • How to wear a skirt
  • When to wear a skirt
  • How to wear a dress
  • When to wear a dress
  • What colors to wear, and when
  • How to look professional but feminine
  • How to look feminine but not slutty
  • What to wear to keep from sweating out in the summer
  • What to wear to keep from freezing in the winter

Everyday Clothes

  • What shirts to buy that don’t make you look like you have an enormous _______________ (chest, arms, neck, shoulders, wrists, stomach….)
  • What pants/shorts to buy that don’t make you look like you have an enormous _______________ (ass, waist, thighs, calves, knees, hips….)
  • What jeans to buy
  • How to afford jeans (seriously, why is this shit so expensive?)
  • What to buy when you don’t want to be noticed
  • What to buy when you do want to be noticed
  • What to buy to avoid looking like your mom and/or sister


  • How to buy heels
  • How to buy heels that don’t make you look slutty
  • How to avoid wearing heels
  • How to walk in heels
  • How to find a ‘cute’ shoe
  • How to find shoes that don’t make your calves look enormous
  • How to find shoes that are comfortable and cute
  • How to wear shoes that don’t stay on your feet (monkey toes!)



  • How to shave your legs
  • How to shave your armpits
  • How to shave everything else
  • How to tuck
  • How to untuck when you have to pee
  • How to moisturize
  • How to afford all the moisturizers you need


  • How to sit like a woman
  • How to walk like a woman
  • How to run like a woman
  • How to sleep with breasts
  • How to sleep ‘cute’
  • How to keep your boobs from knocking into things, or things knocking into your boobs
  • How to keep kids from always putting their elbows into your boobs
  • How to do ________ like a woman (use a computer? That looks different when women do it!)

Everything Else


  • How to cope with sucking at everything
  • How to cope with feeling like you’ll never make any progress
  • How to cope with never having enough time to practice all the absolutely necessary things
  • How to cope with being clocked
  • How to cope with looking ugly
  • How to cope with assholes
  • How to cope with hopelessness
  • How to cope with exhaustion from coping all the damn time
  • How to make the feeling last when you finally catch a glimpse of the person you knew you could be


  • How to respond to the person who is trying to figure out if you’re trans in not-so subtle ways
  • How to avoid getting raped/killed
  • How to avoid getting hit on
  • How to get hit on by the person you want to hit on you
  • How to tell your friends
  • How to tell your family
  • How to find a therapist
  • How to find a doctor
  • How to find a career coach
  • How to find new friends

I’m sure I’m missing obvious things, so let me know what things you had to learn in the comments!